‘Dreaming of perfection’.

The Wild White Goose is the diary of Rev. Master Jiyu’s time in Japan. I would like to use the entry for 17th June as a starting point.

Rev. Haijime said something very sad; he said that human beings are really selfish animals, but that they want to dream of perfection. When they speak hatred and evil they are dreaming of perfection. He concluded that I should remember what he said to me when he saw me first, “Be very careful or we will break your heart.”

We can quite easily misunderstand perfection. When seen through the eye of dualism, perfection, or I idea of it, becomes skewed. It’s more what we think it might be. It is seen through our personal prism. We can mistake seeing clearly for our wants and desires. Our sense of perfection can masquerade as a certainty of truth. When we believe that what we see is how it is, that is ‘dreaming of perfection’.

In the general run of things, to help us understand the world and by extension ourselves we turn to relying on on a set of known equations which by their very nature are limited. This leads to a mistaking of perfection for idealism. When we stick with the idealistic point of view and not understand the ever changing nature of the skandhas our hearts can be broken. In Buddhist practice it is said that the first thing to go is idealism. This was certainly in my own case. To hold on can lead to a sort of despair and possibly a distrust of the practice. We want practice and and our lives to play out in a certain way and when this is not the case we can turn away.

In the ‘Goose’ Rev. Master Jiyu goes through one heck of a lot. Her patience was tested to the extreme as was the trust in the Master/ disiple relationship. It is noticeable early on in the diaries that she looks outward, (understanderbly), and blames all sorts of things for the pain she is feeling. Slowly she sees that the cause is not to be found there. This insight doesn’t make it easier, yet she sees the need to look to her self if suffering is to lessen. When we find for ourselves what it is we truly are then we are closer to knowing the perfection that is being alluded to. To ‘speak hatred and evil and dream of perfection‘ is to believe that we are correct, misunderstand impermanance and act as if there is no cause and effect.

In a way I am writing about sincerity. When seen from this aspect the above sentence is clearer. I was once told that it is possible to be too sincere. This left me scratching my head at the time but later events helped me to see the wisdom in this. It can produce a blinkered way of training, which in turn is a closing down. We think and believe we are doing good but really have shut down and haven’t remained open to the possibilty of change. What is the refuge? If we can stay open it can truly reveal itself.

The diary entry and subsequent repeats in italics are from the ‘The Wild White Goose, the diary of a female Zen Priest’, by Rev. Roshi P.T.N.H. Jiyu – Kennett. Shasta Abbey Press.

 

A dragon for the Buddha

This is the first of an occassional set of Dharma articles which are intended to be short  teachings.

When I was a young monk in the early 2000s I was asked to finish off the side shrines after the re-decoration of the ceremony hall. Part of this was to paint a dragon on an incense stand that stood before the Achalanatha shrine. Having an art background this request involved a mixture of letting go and memory. I came up with a design which I took to Rev. Master Daishin, the Abbot, for discussion. As I was talking to him about the picture and the project I could feel past attachment getting in there and starting to muddy the waters. It was obvious that my sense of self was still mixed up in this. Was it good enough, can I explain myself clearly to him and also, very simply, is it enough. My previous experience of showing paintings in exhibitions was all mixed up in this. I found that I still related to what I did in the monastery in terms of what would it be like hanging in a gallery. To see this of course was invaluable and I was grateful be in a position where it was highlighted. The koan arising in daily life was never more pertinent. As Rev. Master listened to me get all tangled up he could see very clearly my dilemma. In his wise and compassionate way, which as the years rolled on I was to experience again and again, he looked at me and said, ‘ Remember, you are painting a dragon for the Buddha’. This short sentence exploded the whole thing open and the anxiety melted away. If you translate this into your own life and situations see that what we do is not separate to the dharma, To paint a dragon for the Buddha is eating rice and drinking tea. Painting is Dharma and Dharma is painting.

Achalanatha and distraction

This article is a version of the talk that was recently given by myself after the Achalanatha Festival.

Achalanatha has various  attributes. There is the sword, for cutting through delusion, a lasso which represents the Buddhist Precepts and a chain which ties him to the rock upon which he is standing. His body is blue and of course he stands admidst the roaring flames which don’t touch the body. All these things help show us elements of faith and if called upon allow us to work with that which comes to us.

Distraction seems to be at the top of many peoples agendas today. We can see the modern digital social network joined up world as a potential source of dissatisfaction. It has many benefits but also can pose just as many ,if not more, potential harmful aspects. This can be very helpful in starting to see how the mind jumps around and tries to grab what is always just out of reach. This isn’t new of course but does have the potential to throw us around a lot more if we allow it to. This is the nub. Allow it to.

What if we can be fully focused all the time? Is that even preferable? What response does that bring forth? If this being in the moment is forced, is seen as an ideal it can become hard and unyielding. Just being aware though can have a softer more pliant expression which is less self conscious.

Take the scenario of your phone beeping and pinging regularly with alerts. When it does that and catch us unawares what should we do, what do we do? Do we find ourselves jolted out of where we are and responding immediately? The sound of the alert is no different to the sound of anxiety in our heads. A sudden thought which grabs us and we are off in that direction leaving the place we have just been in. Like being ambushed and carried away. We are probably all familiar with something along those lines. As in meditation we are free not to respond, to not follow that movement away. When a thought arises in zazen do we say ourselves ‘I must get this’ or do we allow ourselves a moment to settle and come from a different space and place. It may be that it is good to respond yet that fraction of a moment when we can go in one direction or another is what I’m pointing to. So here we have Achalanatha not leaving his sitting place. The sitting place does not restrict movement yet it is the residing place of the non-dual. I am speaking of awareness of body and mind. This what cuts through tenacious attachments of body and mind

Much teaching is about following. When the bell rings follow. Is there a difference here. It seems to be saying the same thing, doesn’t it? Watch the difference though when we respond with the heart rather than a panicked head response. Looking here we can see that one  thing leads into another having its own own place. The other mode is  a pushing out of one thing and a levering in of another. We now start to see than when we are distracted, or more pointedly,  distracting ourselves, we don’t have to be run around in maybe the way we feel weare led to. If we sit down and watch the telly and it is good to do, that is different to hiding away in it with the hope that our problems are hidden for awhile.This adds to our uneasiness because we are turning away and not towards. Life is put on hold and that is unsustainable. Achalanatha shows how we can be in the flames one pointedly and not be burned. The flames ‘which have been created by clinging to name and form, -a self identity, – the five skandas and the six senses, – and the eight distractions‘. So we attach to a false sense of what and who we are. Identifying with what we see as a solid self rather than an everchanging amalgalm of thoughts and feelings. When we make the movement to turn towards we see that we have  what we need to climb Mount Sumeru. The Buddha sitting atop the altar is not separate from us. We bow to the altar because we are giving up ourselves and not denying the potential we have.

If any human being prone to entertaining despair, – beset by hopelessness, the person should meditate on the ever vigilante One, – and thus learn to stay rooted in the present moment’

The sections in italics are from ‘ In Praise of Achalanatha ‘, which part of the OBC liturgy, and was sung at the Achalanatha Fesival.

 

 

 

 

 

What is a Festival?

You may have seen on the calender a Festival and wondered what it is. We have just held the Achalanatha Festival here at the Priory. This is just one of many Festivals that are spread throughout the year. They may celebrate significant moments in the Buddha’s life, a particular Bodhisattva or maybe one of the teachers that are significant within our tradition. It is a wonderful way for the sangha to come together and look into the many aspects of our practice that have brought us to this moment.

The Festivals are held on Sundays and are always followed by a dharma talk which will expand on what the Festival of that day is pointing to. If you would like to explore this aspect of Buddhist training and have been instructed in our practice there is no need to book in but just come along and explore for yourself.

Newsletter launch on Mailchimp

The September newsletter has just landed in email inboxes. Using mailchimp we have updated the newsletter with a new layout which has photos and links to the website. This will hopefully make it easier to access for example the calender and other items referred to in the newsletter. This will be monthly with roundups of what has happened aswell as looking ahead to future events. If you were already on the group email list then you have to do nothing as your email address was transported across. If you would like to receive the letter then just sign up with the button on the front page of the website.

I have been wanting to do this for quite awhile and thanks to Dan’s know how have managed to do so. I hope you find this a good way to receive news and enjoy reading it.

Here is the picture that tops the newsletter for now.

new newsletter format

We are currently in the process of moving our group emails onto a new system. The newsletter will be available through the website soon. If you are already on the system then you need to do nothing as we are moving that list onto the new one. If you fell off the mailing list after the recent GDPR go round then just sign up afresh. I am hoping this will be a better and and more pleasant way to receive regular information from the priory. Thanks to Dan for his assistance and perserverance.

The Faith programme BBC Radio Berkshire

Over the last year and a bit I have been contacted by BBC Radio Berkshire to talk about aspects of Buddhism. This could be an interview about a Festival i.e. Wesak or Manjusri. I have also given one minute talks on a differnt topic.Below is the short piece on meditation. This obvoiusly is directed at a multi faith audience early on a Sunday morning.

‘I follow the practice of Soto Zen Buddhism. The twin pillars of this are meditation and the Precepts, which are the active aspect. Meditation is the bedrock from which everything flows. A good way into understanding this is the beginning of the Scripture of Great Wisdom, which goes:

“When one with deepest wisdom of the heart, which is beyond discriminative thought”

 

Meditation is the letting go, without judgement, of that which arises in our minds. Doing this regularly allows us to see a deeper truth to the one our minds generally conjure up. We see that when we follow these discriminatory thoughts they can drive us in ways that aren’t helpful, and form behavioural loops which are difficult to get out of. Meditation is a way to see through these repeating patterns and that it is possible to have peace and contentment in our lives. We return to our true spiritual home, a place which we had left but never quite forgot.”

Visit by Head of the Order

Rev. Master Haryo, Head of the Order of Buddhist Contemplatives will be visiting Reading Buddhist Priory during the last week of August. On Wednesday 29th we will be holding an evening where you can come an meet him, whether it is as an old friend or for the first time. It will start at 5.30 with a bring and share meal at 6.00. The main event will be between 7.00 and 9.00 where Rev Master Haryo will give a dharma talk or something similar, (details to be discussed). He is also available during Tuesday and Wednesday for individual meetings. Just let him know directly or through myself to organise a time. I hope as many of you as possible can make it at some point during his visit. Also attending will be Rev. Kanshin who is assisting him on his travels.

Monastic visitors

I was recently visited by Rev. Olwen and Rev Leoma. Rev. Olwen who currently resides at Throssel Hole Buddhist Abbey and Rev. Leoma is prior of The Norwich temple. They came mainly to discuss charity affairs but also to take the chance revisit the priory which has played a large part in their lives.On wednesday evening during the regular group evening they had a chance to meet old friends who are still current members of the priory congregation. I thoroughly enjoyed hosting them and hope to do again sometime.

New meditation hall carpet

We have just had the new carpet for the meditation hall fitted. It is the last of the major changes that have been happening over the past year. The overall plan was to keep the room light but add some warmth and an embrace. I hope you agree that the carpet has aided this. We de-squeeked some of the flooring especially around the gong, which means walking meditation should be a bit more quiet in places. It was paid for with a generous donation, which was accepted with gratitude and bows.